When The Waves are Sorrow

I know the lyric to Across the Universe goes "pools of sorrow, waves of joy," and I understand the meaning. Sorrow can feel like a deep and endless pool, but for me, lately, the waves aren't of joy so much as sorrow and grief. Life lately has been survival and attempting to get back into what is the new "normal." The challenge is, I feel like I'm standing in the ocean, waist deep. Most of the time I'm floating in those pools, or at least along with the calm ebb and flow of the tide, but some days, like on Saturday, I am knocked over completely by a wave so big and powerful it pulls me under and holds me there. It hurts, and I can feel my lungs burning as I strain to hold my breath until the current releases me. This overwhelming ache of loss and sadness.

I miss my mommy. I know it never goes away. I know this, and I know that eventually the waves are less powerful, either that or I better learn how to dodge them, ride them. There doesn't seem to be any real consensus on which, only that time helps heal. I just wish this salt water didn't burn so damn much.

Comments

  1. Hi, Catherine. I clicked over from Makeup and Beauty Blog to say that I love your blog name, Books Beauty Bling. I'm sorry things have been hard lately. Sending you lots of virtual hugs. *hugs* - Karen

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    1. Thank you so much, Karen! <3 I love your blog, and seeing the adventures of Tabs and Connor Claire.

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    2. Thank you so much, Karen! <3 I love your blog, and seeing the adventures of Tabs and Connor Claire.

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